My sister was obviously upset about the repercussions of her question to her husband but I wasn’t sure to either laugh or buy a ticket to Illinois to lay into my brother-in-law but I was quite amused by the start of this conversation because this isn’t something I would have ever thought would come out of my sister’s mouth…..my mouth, yes…..hers no.
“OK… calm down…start all over….you asked him WHAT?”
“So the boys are with mom and dad for a week and I’ve been home alone watching shows other than Dora the Explorer, like morning talk shows….reality shows and listening to Ryan’s Roses…..I know I shouldn’t be listening to his show because it always plays with my head but I just had to…but the caller started talking about a threesome and I don’t know what possessed me but I asked Mike what he thought about them ”
If you don’t know what Ryan’s Roses is, it’s done by Ryan Seacrest on 102.7 in the mornings on his morning radio show. Callers write in who suspect their significant other may be cheating on them…..Patty then calls the significant other and offers them a free dozen roses….the catch is to see what the person writes on the card and who he/she sends them to…..8 out of 10 times it’s to someone other than the worried party and with both on the line shit hits the fan. It’s a total train wreck.
“Ok, so let me get this straight…..you just asked him flat-out what he thought about threesomes?”
“Yes and he was appaulled that I would even bring that subject up…… but then he came home from work and told me that we needed to talk…… he started to accuse me of cheating on him because why else would I ask him about threesomes if I wasn’t already thinking of it and that I must have someone on the side……I tried to tell him that it was just a question, it really got blown out of proportion Jolene, I started crying and then he got upset with me for crying. Now things are really strange between us….he’s distant.”
I felt bad for my sister, how dare Michael jump to such an asinine conclusion ….this is MY SISTER!!
“So you guys never talked about stuff like this before…..threesomes,fantasies, toys…other bedroom stuff?”
“No we don’t talk about stuff like THAT”
I was a little confused…..why hadn’t they?? In the last ten years they never thought to bring up things that may improve or spice up their sex life…….I’m not talking about venturing into having a threesome….but other stuff…..a little spanking never hurt anyone.
“Well sis, it’s not like talking about that will send you to hell, it’s healthy to talk about what might spice up things in the bedroom with your husband. First, he shouldn’t have jumped the gun and maybe he’s been talking to Chris who is going through a divorce because his wife cheated on him…….his thoughts and experience are probably influencing Mikes quick assumption to think that you have all of a sudden jumped on the kinky train (I swear his Pollock shows sometimes), secondly there is NOTHING wrong with asking him a question like that for Christ sake you have been married for ten years….this question should have came up…..maybe he ventured into that area before you …who knows…I’m not afraid to ask my hubby things. Let me ask you a question seeing that you guys don’t talk about the bedroom stuff how’s your sex life, is it dry or is it hot and steamy?”
I’m really upfront with my sister, always have been. There isn’t any need for me to beat around the bush.
“Well, it’s kind of dry…..we don’t talk about fantasies or things like that”
I ended up telling my sister that she really needed to sit down and talk to her husband tonight, clear the air and help him understand that it was just a question and that she shouldn’t have to feel uncomfortable bringing up things pertaining to sex, that she desires only him but maybe talking about each other fantasies may very well bring some much needed heat back into the bedroom….heck bring in a toy or two….tie that Bear fan up and smack him on the ass a few times…..hahahah…..all joking aside I think I comforted my sister a little. I hope he at least listens to her ……..
(I did get my sisters permission to write about this)
How open are you to your spouse or partner? Is bedroom talk excluded from your relationship? Do you believe that talking about your desires and fantasies help keep the passion alive in the bedroom?