Never claimed to be Mrs. Molly Homemaker

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I can hold my own in the kitchen, I’m no Rachel Ray by any means but I have a few dishes that I make that leave people saying “mmmm that was good!”. I have cookbooks galore that I skim through occasionally for new ideas, an “PIN” yummy must trys on Pinterest daily and when I get control of the remote 9 times out of ten the channel gets turned to the Food Network.

In the past couple of months the hubby has given some rather “helpful” suggestions for making the my cooking process easier. “You should prep our meals for the week”, “While making dinner you should prep for tomorrows meal”, “Guy marinates his meats overnight, you should try that”. Although his suggestions were received with a smile I kindly reminded him that I will not be prepping meals ahead of time (been there done that) and he is always welcomed to utilize the kitchen to make meals anytime he wants. “You know I don’t cook, I just don’t know why you can’t do step A and B then C and D tomorrow” he said.  Although, I understood his point… but for a man who has pretty much survived on PB&J sandwiches and Oreo cookies before we were married he just needs to just sit on the couch and leave the cooking to me…..I don’t suggest easier ways to go about tending to our yard or claim to be Bob Villa, I know my place.

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I’ve tried to explain to him that “prepping” meals isn’t as easy as it may sound, it takes time A LOT of time and I have tried this numerous times when the kids were younger but ….it just isn’t something that I enjoyed doing….BUT  if I knew that the pots and pans would be cleaned by him then maybe I would rethink the whole meal prepping idea.  We can all guess what his answer to that one was.

I know of families that prep their meals but they have children at home and a busy lifestyle where prepped meals make sense; but it’s just the two of us…. I just don’t see the need to prep meals.

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I did “entertain” the idea of prepping our meals not so long ago and came across a couple of blogs that are all about this crazy idea……….It didn’t take me long to laugh out loud and say “OH HELL NO” especially when I saw the kitchen sink full of mixing bowls, pots and pans, but I kept reading …… skimming their weekly recipes and knew instantly that my hubby wouldn’t be down with a weekly rotation of ground turkey, chicken breast and ground beef….he would definitely question the little grainy things on his plate which I would later have explain what quinoa was and why it doesn’t really have any flavor.

“Honey you knew I wasn’t Molly Homemaker before we got married but I haven’t made you sick, your food isn’t burnt and you seem pretty pleased with your meals…but if your compliments about how good dinner was were just little fibs then you know where to find the Peanut Butter and Jelly …and the bread is over there”  I told him as I headed to the bathroom with the furkids to give them a bath.

mind you, it was late evening….about 8pm, yeah I have PLENTY of time to prep meals. 

 

The picture says it all

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My father is Lutheran and my mother is Catholic, so sometime before I was born it was decided that I would be brought up Catholic and attend Catholic school. I wore the very fashionable plaid school uniforms till 8th grade and was lectured by nuns time and time again when my skirt was not of proper length, not only did I attend church on Sundays but a couple of times during the week as well; joys of going to Catholic school!, Ash Wednesday was always a big to do, next to Christmas ….. my classmates (all 30 of them) and I would compare “ash marks” to see whose was bigger and discuss what we were going to give up for the next forty days. It was always the same “I’m giving up being mean to my sister” or “I’m not going to drink soda” …….midway through the Lenten season all was forgotten and I would slip, but then get reminded that I was going to hell because not only was I weak and couldn’t make the 40 days but due to my disgust for anything seafood I would end up eating something with meat on Fridays.

I remember sitting at the dinner table as a young girl hearing my father excuse my carnivorous rebellion to my mother, stating that eating fish on Fridays during Lent was due to some pope (back in the day) helping out the fishing industry therefore making eating fish acceptable. The case he presented made sense,  why wouldn’t I believe him? granted he was the one who also convinced me that fish had ears and if I made a sound while fishing I would scare away all the fish; to a naïve little girl this made sense.

As I got older this “Church-fishing industry conspiracy” always got the best of me and little ole me would go one on one with the head strong nuns when I would show up to school with a salami sandwich on Fridays….I always lost, of course. As an adult I’m still very curious, my dad wasn’t the only one that shared their Fishy Theory, it was almost like a made for television CSI movie. Was there some medieval Pope who had a hankering for fish and declared it to be the go to meal during Lent? either way, I’m still not eating it.

AND…. yes I do know that the purpose of Lent is for prayer, penance, repentance of sins, atonement and self-denial. We also are told to sacrifice something for forty days…..my question is why does this “something” have to be food or of material value. I’ve read so many posts on Facebook stating that they are giving up the internet, fast food, wine, bread, clothes shopping, soda etc. What’s wrong with giving up being inpatient, manipulative,unfaithful, self-righteous for forty days? instead of losing your cool and yelling….work on holding your tongue for forty days.  (Jesus did sacrifice more than just a loaf of bread for you right?)

Is it easier to “sacrifice” and go without your favorite Starbucks coffee than to actually come face to face with something within yourself that is your own personal down fall like anger issues, low self-esteem, gossiping and stopping your bad behavior for forty days? can you imagine how your life would be forty days from now if you were able to give up yelling, or being inpatient, or cheating on your spouse or being a doormat for a bully to walk all over. Sure it will be tough, of course you will have to be on your toes making sure you don’t fall….but isn’t sacrifice suppose to be hard? once all is done YOU will have found your own inner strength to get past your struggles, you would have fought those inner demons and in the end have found inner peace.

What’s better than that?

Not even icy roads can keep me from chocolate!

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I kept peeking out the window in hopes that all the ice that covered the street had miraculously melted during the time that I was in the shower. No such luck, my craving for brownies was beginning to frustrate me. It wasn’t so much the brownie itself that I needed….I needed that yummy chocolate batter. This was as close to any sexual frustration that I have ever felt but there was no toy, no chocolate substitution that could take this edge off but that dang Pillsbury Funfetti Brownie mix.

I had an idea ….

I cornered my hubby in the hallway and gave him one of my flirtatious  “I have a proposition for you” looks.

“Soooo, I was wondering something”  smiling as I twirled a strand of my hair.

“Yesssss” he said.

“If you take me to the store to buy brownie mix I’d make it worth your while later” as I brushed my hand  against his cock.  “You don’t even have to change, I just need you to drive me …. the roads are too icy for me to drive”.    He laughed and headed to the garage, next thing I heard was him start up the car.

Who knew it could be that easy…..but he wins either way, he gets brownies and a little somethin somethin later on!!

So, yes……. I made brownies, thanks to my hubby who maneuvered his way through icy side streets to get me to the store. I also think he knew I was getting a bit stir crazy and needed to get out even if it was just for twenty minutes.

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And yes……I licked that spoon clean, along with any chocolatey goodness that was left in the bowl.

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Day two of being stuck inside: Can’t wait for spring

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School closures due to weather was something that rarely happened when I was growing up in Southern California, but on those rare occasions that the city shut down due to a dusting of snow I was thrilled…..I slept in, lounged around in my pjs, built blanket forts and tried my best to make a snowman out of slushy dirty snow.

What’s wrong?” my husband asked, as I let out a big sigh. I had just heard the weatherman say that the roads would be even worse than they were today and it would be best for all to stay inside tomorrow. “I just want to go back to work!!” . Geez, two days inside and cabin fever is finally taken over. “well, you can always work in the other room and organize it….that’s work” he said with a sly smile. That wasn’t my idea of work or fun. “yeah I plan on organizing my closet in a bit” I told him. I really have to find a place for my sweaters considering our kitties enjoy snuggling up against them and on some occasions knock them off the shelf.

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This is day two of being homebound due to the weather (day 5 of my long weekend) and icy roads, our backyard is covered in white……noooo not snow, sleet…..ice….slippery ice!! I wish it was snow, there would have been a family of snowmen decked out in scarves and hats in our yard by now.

I have read two books, cleaned the fridge, played countless games of fetch with Lily, watched hours of the History channel with the hubby and learned all about the Men who Built America, Pinterested my brains out, I’m craving chocolate….brownies (from a box) but due to the stupid icy roads I can’t go buy a mix….and before you say “just make some from scratch” I don’t have any coco, but I DO have hot coco mix ( I wonder if that would work) but that’s for later tonight when I have a desire for some Baileys and Hot Coco. I washed all the laundry and then some, caught up on my reality t.v shows, still didn’t learn my lesson and watched a few Ancient Aliens shows with the hubby and although the things those scientist say are a bit far-fetched I still wish they would just stop showing pics of those green bug-eyed aliens……but what’s even worse is this guys hair!! I’m all about volume but this is a little much.

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“I think I figured this whole time travel thing out” I said to my husband ….. he looked amused and listened intently. “So they (scientist and big hair guy) claim that we were visited eons ago by aliens who equipped our people with tools to make the pyramids and strange carvings in stones that NO ONE can figure out how it was done…..but it HAS to be aliens,they say……but maybe Seldon and Leonard did discover time travel, they went back with our tools now to the time of the great pyramids and showed them how it was done…but they couldn’t leave any evidence behind because that would alter the world as we know it, clearly makes sense!!”  he laughed and turned the channel, to something more entertaining….The Big Bang Theory!!

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It’s very clear that I need to go back to work and I hope that the sun comes out and melts all this stuff away but like my hubby and the weatherman has said over and over again……it may melt but it will just ice up when the temps are at freezing. Sigh…. “I just have things that need to get done and I miss work”, I mumbled.

hmmm….I wonder if I can find a recipe for brownies but tweak it a little bit with smashed chocolate chip cookies that it would taste good? I’m seriously on a mission to curb this craving!!

 

House Divided: A fellow blogger needs some helpful advice…….

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Earlier this week I wrote about an ultimatum that I was given regarding my furkid, Lily….my post resonated with a fellow blogger who is currently going through a similar situation. After reading her email I felt her pain and asked her if I could share her current dilemma with you all in hopes that she can get the encouragement, wisdom and strength that she so needs.

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Clara is married, has 3 children under the age of ten and lives in a quaint suburban neighborhood. Back in October of last year they decided to add to the family and adopt a dog, I will call him Fido. Fido was less than a year when they got him so he still had those puppy tendencies.

This was the families’ first pet (besides the occasional fish) and it was a major adjustment for everyone, but mostly Clara who took on all the responsibilities that come with owning a dog. As the weeks went on, her husband grew irritated with Fido…he never allowed himself to bond with him. She assumed this was because he never had any pets growing up, where she had. She knew there was a problem when she had to go out of town for a couple days due to her job and her husband refused to take care of Fido while she was gone.  “You will need to kennel him or find someone to watch him” he told her. He didn’t want the responsibility of caring for this bundle of cuteness while she was gone…..knowing that  kenneling the pup would be costly and her tight wad of a husband was now making things difficult with her regarding Fido, she told her employer that she wasn’t able to attend the conference.  She also thought maybe the best thing she could do was give Fido back to the family who adopted him out because of all the tension that was brewing at home….she called the family and they were more than happy to take him back. She changed her mind 2 days later.

A month ago Clara noticed that Fido wasn’t acting right and took him to the vet; after many tests and several Xrays it was determined that Fido had several objects (toys,hairband) in his stomach and surgery was necessary. $1200 later Fido was recovering.  While he was under the watchful eye of the vet, Clara was home being made to feel as though Fido’s incident was her fault, her husband demanded that she get rid of the dog and that she owed HIM $1200. (You heard me, she owed him)  She was beyond stressed and beside herself, she tried to sell things to pay her “debt” back to her husband, there was no reasoning with him at all, a day didn’t go by that he didn’t send her into a tearful mess…..just his crude words and cold heart towards this pup baffled her. He made her feel guilty for wanting to get together with her friends for her birthday stating that she still owes him $1200 and how they can’t afford it.  (They have money).

Tension just grew between them, she knew he was being unreasonable but talking to him was like talking to a brick wall. He claimed he never wanted a dog and only agreed to shut her up…..she didn’t know what else to do so she called the previous family to see if they would take the dog back, they agreed. The thing is they live in Texas and can’t get him until sometime in March. Clara was broken hearted, cried daily…this little furkid was her baby, she loved him.

Clara told me that she got the courage to talk to her husband about everything …. He claimed that he never told her to get rid of him, granted he never spoke those words his actions spoke loud and clear. She thought maybe she could go back on her word  (again) with the previous owners but her husband still refused to have anything to do with Fido if she had to go out of town and the money issue would never be dropped. She then blamed herself because she knew he wasn’t going to own up to his coldness towards this whole thing.

“What do you think I should do?” she asked.

I went over what she sent a couple times; we exchanged a few emails just so I could  get the full story. I finally told her that:

1. She shouldn’t have to OWE her husband anything. She’s in a marriage not a business, they both work and financially contribute to the household and that it was their decision to bring Fido into the family. Granted, if he never wanted a dog this should have been addressed….he shouldn’t have just gave in to “shut her up”.

2. I told her that I didn’t understand why he isn’t willing to take care of the dog when she is required to go out of town to attend seminars for her job. She shouldn’t have to kennel him … she should be able to count on her spouse to take responsibility for their four-legged furkid, plus would the cost of kenneling him be tacked on to the debt that he claims she owes him?

3. I also told her that the issues with the dog are just the icing on the cake…..there has to be more. She needs to find her voice in that marriage because in my opinion she doesn’t have one, not really. When finances are concerned he can buy what he wants (2 laptops in a mth….computer time/games) and come up with a valid reason for these non-budgeted items but when she needs something “its not in the budget”  is what she hears.

4. I told her that she can’t go back on her word again with the previous family who had Fido, they are looking forward to having him back…..plus it’s not like her husband is going to change his mind…..any unforeseen expenses with be HER FAULT, the tension will STILL be there, he isn’t going to change. Plus, Fido needs a yard to run in, he needs a family that will love him completely.

My heart breaks for her…..I can’t imagine being in her shoes right now.

Please feel free to leave your comments for her here…… she will read all of them!!  Thank you  🙂

Hilarious First Date Story

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Have you ever read something that was so funny that it left you in tears? I came across a story about a woman talking about a first date; what started off as a sweet and totally romantic evening turned into extreme horror…..it’s pretty much every girls nightmare. Flatulence.

Girls… we have all been there, we eat a little too much during dinner, we fall victim to sharing a desert with our date ( or partner), any stomach gurgles get ignored because you think you have plenty of time before you have to use the bathroom……and then it hits, normally when you are in a passionate embrace or sitting quietly in his car staring into each others eyes……..that sharp gas pain. Your eyes start scanning the proximity for a restroom, you start thinking of ways end the date without having to tell him the real reason why you need to cut the date short, beads of sweat start to form….he assumes the sudden glistening on your face is because of him not because you have a war brewing in your stomach.

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Take a moment and read The Fart That (almost) Altered My Destiny and then come back here!!

~you’re welcome~  ….take a breath, wipe those tears!!

It was worth it wasn’t it?? I bet you passed on that story to all your girlfriends and co-workers right?…if not don’t you think they deserve a bit of laughter?

Do you have any horrific dating stories? 

 

 

 

 

My husband has George Bailey beat

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Just like our one year anniversary, I was left in the dark regarding any Valentine’s Day plans that he had up his sleeve. Days leading up to Valentine’s no mention of what we would do were tossed around; I just assumed we would go into town and have dinner.

Yesterday we slept in (we had the day off), I made my husband and the fur kids eggs and bacon for breakfast and shortly after breakfast was eaten and the kitchen was cleaned I settled on the couch and started to read a book. Hours went by and it was then that he came up to me and led me into the bedroom where the Valentine’s Day fun began (if you know what I mean), once the fun was had I went into the bathroom and that’s when he came in and told me that we were leaving in thirty minutes.

“Where are we going?” I asked. “You will have to see when we get there” he replied.

*intrigued and very curious*

I dressed, fixed my make-up , did my hair and threw a bunch of things in my purse (because I had no idea what was on the agenda) in thirty minutes flat…..I owe it to my mommy skills, I learned a long time ago to shower, do my hair, apply my make-up in no time, this skill has totally paid off many times.

We drove through the country side and headed up to Petit Jean State Park where we stopped off to get some yummy fudge, which totally beats any chocolate you find in a heart shaped box.  “Ok, are you ready to go home…that was it” he said.  I knew he was joking but followed suit “sure, I’m totally content with chocolate fudge” I smiled.

We headed east for quite some time, he asked me if I had any clue where we were headed and I really didn’t. I thought maybe we were going to visit the wineries up in Altus but I was wrong….we headed up to Mount Magazine, snow covered parts of the mountain…it was beautiful. We pulled into the lodge and made our way inside. “Did he plan a weekend get away? I didn’t bring any underwear, I guess I could go commando? I hope they sell toothbrushes in the gift shop” I thought.

He told me to go browse the gift shop while he spoke to the person behind the desk …… I tried to eavesdrop but was unsuccessful.  He told me minutes later that he did try to book a room weeks ago but they were already booked solid but we were going to have dinner here but had to waste sometime (since it was still early), so we went to the bar and had a couple glasses of wine. He kept talking about an event that we had to get to but didn’t elaborate, he was still keeping mum.

At six o’clock he told me we had to go so, I took a sip of my wine and I followed him upstairs… seriously trying not to trip with each step I took; one glass of wine I’m good any more than that my true klutzy self comes shining through.  Once we made it upstairs….we went outside to join up with a park ranger who had quite the fancy telescope.

“So do you know why we are here?” he said….. “uhm, no”, I answered. “What’s going on in the East?” he asked. “The sun is setting” I answered. “So what’s going to happen next?” …..this wasn’t the time for a little quiz, I was freezing and my brain doesn’t quite work with 2 ½ glasses of wine in my system. He saw that I had no clue and chimed in, “the moon is going to rise over that mountain as soon as the sun sets and we are here to watch it rise and see it up close through the telescope”. The park ranger began to tell us some moon facts as the moon started to peak over the mountain. This was the coolest thing I ever saw, yeah I’ve seen the moon plenty of times but not like this, we took turns looking through the telescope and admiring the beautiful view in front of us.

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After getting our fill of the moon we headed on inside the lodge for dinner. I stuffed myself silly and said no to desert. It was around 9:30pm when we headed home….I was tired but I dare not close my eyes, we reminisced about our day and how he had planned this whole thing weeks ago and listened to the radio until we couldn’t get a signal…..that’s when he turned on the cd player and hit track 7.

The voice of a female country singer came over the speaker singing a very beautiful ballad, “what a romantic” I thought. I listened to the lyrics:

I will give you my heart
until the end of time
you’re all I need, my love, my Valentine

Aww, I couldn’t believe it….he planned that….that’s something I would have done. “Who is singing?” I asked, he told me it was Martina McBride. As the song continued to play, he held my hand and then pointed at the moon.

“Thank you honey for such an amazing night, you gave me the best gift ever…..you gave me the moon, George Bailey couldn’t even do that!”

(for those who don’t know who George Bailey is he is from the movie, It’s a Wonderful Life)

Revenge by weight loss

I didn’t watch the Biggest Loser this season but from what I have read this morning this seasons winner, Rachel Frederickson made mouths drop due to her extreme weight loss. She went from being a size 20 to 0/2 and in my opinion I think she went a little overboard with trying to win this seasons title of the Biggest Loser!

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I get it … I really do, shit if I was on National T.V and had to reveal how much I had lost, I’d probably wire my mouth shut, stick to a liquid diet, try some outrageous workouts and then purchase the best Spanx body suit so any remaining lumps wouldn’t be visible. Personally I give kudos to all those contestants that are brave enough to sport those hideous outfits week after week and step on a scale in front of all to see….I just cringe every time I have to step on the scale at my doctor’s office and sometimes will look away and tell the nurse that I don’t want to know how much I weigh.

The problem that I am having with our winner is what she claims to have weighed during her make-over.

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“I started as a [size] 20 and now I’m a 0/2. I was a 6 during makeover week. It’s all about maintaining now!” she told Us

I’m sorry but I don’t believe Rachel (5’4) was a size 6 during the make-over show. She claimed to be 150 and a size 6…..well let me just say that I am 5’5 and a little less than 150 and there is no way in hell I could squeeze myself into a size 6, not even the best Spanx on the planet could manage that feat.

Yeah, I’ve been guilty of lying about my weight from time to time, especially at the DMV, but there would be no way I would tell all of America that I was a size 6 when indeed I wasn’t….pictures don’t lie….a size 10 would be believable a size 6 is a bit of a stretch.

I do hope that once all the excitement of her win dies down that Rachel has herself a nice tasty steak …..but for now I bet she’s basking in her win and secretly wishing that the man who broke her heart crawls back to her asking for forgiveness to only get told that he could go to hell!

Sometimes revenge by weight loss can be super sweet!!

 

A walk down memory lane

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Sunday morning Ann (my daughter) and I went into the shed to grab some of her boxes that were filled with her childhood memories, inside one of her boxes was a journal that I started on December 4,  1986….I was 12. I briefly went though it and laughed at a black and white photo of Kirk Cameron that I had taped to one of the pages with the words “ I love Kirk Cameron” written on the other page.

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Last night I opened up my journal and instantly tales of my childhood came alive, reading about growing up in Catholic school was quite entertaining, because that’s where I got my first taste of cliques and how to survive being on the chopping block. Every week it seemed someone upset the “leader” of the group and on this particular day I was cast out of the group …. and now was taken in by the “goody two shoes” of our class.

Nancy hates me and I’m trying to figure out why all she said was “I hate you and I’m not kidding” I’m thinking it was because I wasn’t loud enough in cheerleading practice.  

A couple of months later…. in big black marker appeared “Nancy is no longer here, she went to a new school” and all was right again.

Page after page was a synopsis about my day and an update on the status of my grade school crush was at the bottom in red ink, the funny thing was is one week I’d like him, two weeks later I hated him just to turn around a week later to state how I like him again.

Some memories didn’t leave me laughing, as I continued reading the words of my twelve-year-old self; I was reminded of the many times I got a “lickin” (spanked with the belt) for something my sister had done or for trying to stand up for myself…which never went in my favor.

“my dad took the calico vision out of the playroom and put it in my sister’s room because she wanted to play with it. It was given to both of us for Christmas but she cried because she wanted it in her room, now my dad switched our television sets and guess what ….when I went to turn it on, it doesn’t work”

From what came next didn’t play out in my favor and no amount of trying to get my point across worked because I ended up getting grounded. I still hadn’t learned to just keep my mouth shut. 

One thing that became apparent on those pages was how a childhood friendship was changing and the things that I wrote about back then hadn’t really changed much from the present day. I felt the frustration that my younger self felt as she was trying to make sense of why her friend felt that she had to pretend to be something that she wasn’t just to fit in.

“Marie is acting weird. I don’t know I think it’s because she has stuck up friends and she’s trying to be like them”  , “Marie called and said she couldn’t go to my birthday party because she was going to skateland with her friends from school. She knew about my party since December” , “ I don’t know why Marie invited me to her sleepover when she planned to ignore me. She’s starting to act like them, why would someone want to act like an airhead?”

I don’t know why it was so important for me to hold onto this friendship so tightly, my only guess was the promise we made as little girls to remain friends forever. No matter the changes that I saw in her as time went on I still held on tightly to that promise making excuses for her behavior, always baffled why she thought she had to “play” a certain part for her friends or the people she surrounded herself with.  It wasn’t until very recently that I decided to put our friendship to rest and to leave the memory of those two little girls who at one time were inseparable in the past…where their friendship was carefree and innocent and not plagued by “growing up”.

What surprised me as I continued to read the pages of my journal was that I kept coming back making small entries….sometimes they were quick updates or details of my broken heart. The last entry was August 1996 … I think I will just leave a little note that says  “For a recent update just google Valley Girl Gone Country” . 

 

 

 

 

 

 

A bittersweet birthday weekend

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Thursday seemed more like my birthday then my actual birthday which was Saturday, my co-workers spoiled me rotten with a delicious chocolate cake, lunch of my choice…. which was McDonalds, a hilarious card and a few gifts. I was also pleasantly surprised when I got an edible arrangement from my father. I admit his gesture did leave me a bit perplexed because my father doesn’t do things like this…..the message didn’t say “Happy Birthday”, just “Hope your “big day” goes well” from Daddy Jack.  No Love Dad, No Love Mom and Dad….just from Daddy Jack. Ok….well the gesture was nice and quite yummy.  Later that evening my daughter Ann finally arrived and I was not only relieved that she was home but that she arrived safe and sound…..although no parent wants to hear “I almost fell asleep a couple of times while I was driving” and when I heard those very words spill out of her mouth I made a mental note to give her my Starbucks gift card before she headed back to Nebraska on Sunday.

KittyFriday was a long day ….. I took our newest furkid, Penny (the stray kitty) to the vet only to find out that she is 22 days pregnant, “congratulations you are going to be a grandma” the vet assistant said as she gave me a picture of the ultrasound. I looked down at the picture and the only thought that I had was “Holy Shit, how am I going to deliver this news to hubby”.  The Doc came in and discussed several options…. “she’s still early along in her pregnancy that we can spay her still, just don’t wait too long”….he must have seen the look on my face because the subject just wasn’t something I wanted to think about….”I will have the nurse come in with some estimates”. Ok.   —– Long story short, Hubby made the decision to have her spayed, there was no debate or argument…it was just how it was going to be. I called the Vet and made the appointment (and made it clear that it wasn’t my choice, they knew) he took her in this morning.

Later that day we made the trek to Oklahoma (five hour drive), we were meeting up with his family to see his ailing mom. It broke my heart to see the sadness in my husbands eyes when he held his moms hand and whispered a sweet message in her ear …but instead of breaking down, I stayed strong…for him. Once his brothers arrived at the nursing home, I made certain that they were left alone with her…… my daughter Ann decided to make friends with some of the elderly ladies that were on the same wing as momma, one in particular really took to my daughter….her name was Lola and for the next couple of days when we went to visit momma….Ann made her way to Lolas room to spend some time with her. Ann really has a gift……the compassion and love she has for people is just amazing. She’s certainly not shy but she never was …haha…she just has always had this knack for striking up conversations with strangers.  After visiting with Momma, we joined the rest of the family for dinner at a steakhouse and boy I couldn’t wait to sink my teeth into a good tasty steak and dive right into a fully loaded baked potato….see my ass has been on a diet for a couple of months, my goal was to lose 20 pounds by my birthday….I was 3 pounds shy of meeting my goal but I rewarded myself that night!!

This was the only picture taken of me this weekend. I would have smiled if I knew I was being photographed. :)  this is me and my niece playing a game on my phone.....Ann is busy texting her boyfriend and the hubby is yapping about something.

This was the only picture taken of me this weekend. I would have smiled if I knew I was being photographed. 🙂 this is me and my niece playing a game on my phone…..Ann is busy texting her boyfriend and the hubby is yapping about something.

Saturday (my 40th bday) morning I woke up expecting to see a head full of gray hair but when I looked at myself in the mirror all that came to mind was “fuzzy wazzy was a bear” my hair for some reason lost all its curl from the night before and now was a frizzy mess…….my curling iron and straightener were at home, 5 hours away so I pulled my hair back in a ponytail and did my best to calm the frizz.

I thought I would hear a “Happy Birthday” out of my husbands mouth when we first woke up….but I was wrong. It came an hour later in a mumbled tone…… I kept telling myself that it wasn’t about me today, well not while we were in Oklahoma, we would celebrate my birthday later in the evening when we got home.  We headed to the nursing home and spent a couple of hours with Momma, she opened her eyes a bit but that was all……I knew family would be coming by shortly so I gently washed her face, combed her hair, put lotion on her face and hands and spoke to her like she could hear us. After our visit, we joined the rest of the family for breakfast, made one last trip to the nursing home and headed home…..5 hours later we were back in Arkansas  (7 pm) , we decided to go to Anns favorite restaurant  here in town which has a huge seafood buffet and although I can’t stand seafood, we went because she doesn’t come out here often and plus it put a smile on her face…….so while the two of them ate shrimp, crawfish and other fishy food I had the salad bar and a few things that weren’t seafood related that was on the buffet. I just knew once we got home I could have a large slice of chocolate cake……so I was saving room for my desert.

Once home we were welcomed at the door by some very excited furkids, boy did I miss them!  when they were settled and fed, I checked my phone and saw that there was a voicemail from my parents…..I hit play expecting to hear both of them wishing me a Happy Birthday, but it was just the voice of my dad saying Happy Birthday.  It didn’t surprise me at all that I didn’t hear the voice of my mother saying “Happy Birthday”  along with my dad, that’s her…..she has her reasons for being who she is. It pretty much showed me that I made the right decision to forgo the Hawaii trip. Ok….it sucked, I had hopes that this year would be different…..I was hoping to take baby steps towards mending our very broken relationship, but who am I kidding. I knew better…..it made sense why my moms name wasn’t on the special delivery I received at work on Thursday from my dad.

I put my phone away and headed to the kitchen to devour a slice of cake…..and once that piece of heavenly goodness touched my tongue, I wished myself a Happy Birthday ….the only thing missing was a nice glass of wine to wash down the chocolaty desert.