I don’t make resolutions because I know by mid January my resolutions would be a mere memory it’s kind of like how I am during Lent, I say I’m going to give up bread or wine but a month later I find myself in mid sip or swallow and then a “ohh shit” comes out of my mouth. (It’s not that I am not disciplined in my faith as some may think, but that’s for a different post) Every year I do a reflection of the past year and of myself; I think of the things that I would like to tweak….things that I would like to accomplish and things that I need to eliminate from my life. Self reflection can be a humbling experience…. it is for me anyway.
I’ve made a decision to step away from a (20 + year) friendship that was just consumed of drama. I allowed her crazy lifestyle to affect me and I just can’t do it anymore. Her lies …. Her toxic relationships … Her bad choices …Her twisted stories were too much….she was too absorbed in her own made up world that it felt like I was part of a new reality show. I couldn’t do it anymore…I’m starting a new chapter of my life and she won’t be part of it.
(2 hours later)
Ok, well this self-reflection, no more drama in my life will have to start tomorrow because I’m beyond pissed off at the moment.
I received and email from the hubby asking me to bring home the receipts for two of his Christmas presents that I got him, one was for a tool that he asked for and the other was something that I put a lot of thought into, I got him a GoPro so he can use while he takes his bike rides. I spent hours….days researching the best GOPRO to get him, I thought about the stories he’s told me regarding roads he rode on that were crazy dangerous, I remembered how many times he would pause a MotoGP race just to show me the view that was taken from the bike…scene by scene…his excitement just made me realize that this was the gift that I was going to get for him at Christmas.
I asked him if he was going to return the gifts, hoping he would say no….but that wasn’t the case. His reply was “Yes, I don’t have a need for them”. I instantly felt insulted ….that gift wasn’t some fugly barney purple looking slippers, this was a cool gift that I put some good ass thought into it!!! Tears started to fill my eyes as I typed him up a response. I kept it simple with no mention of the ugly slippers but I mentioned how him wanting to return the gift made me feel……of course he didn’t respond. I didn’t think he would.
I know I shouldn’t care, but I was so dang excited for him to open that gift. I actually was able to keep that gift a secret and me and secrets ……….well GIFT secrets are soooooo hard to keep!!! His reaction when he opened the gift was of surprise and excitement………..nothing like my reaction to the purple monstrosities. I’m pissed off !!! I can understand about him returning that tool from Home Depot but I don’t understand about why he wants to return the GoPro!! it’s a damn cool gift!!!