Yesterday I wrote about The Things My Mother Never Warned Me About which entails the advice that I have given my two daughters (19 and 22yrs old) in hopes that they would never have to utter the words “Mom, why didn’t you tell me”, the “words of wisdom” that I gave them of course needed to be tweaked for my son, who is 17.
When it comes to my son, he’s a little tough to crack. It will take him awhile to open up and share things that are bothering him but he has always known that he can confide in me and that I will listen. I always know when something is up because he gets snappy, he shuts himself off to the world and looks as though he had been crying…..or as he would say “he had something in his eye”.
As my son got older I had this overwhelming fear that he would pick up some of his fathers bad habits and that the polite boy with manners would disappear. I would often remind him to,
Open the door for girls…..cars door, front door ….any door.
If you ask a girl out to the movies or dinner pay for them. (He went a bit further with this and not only paid for his date but her two sisters that HAD to tag along)
If you are no longer interested in the girl you’re dating, don’t string her along. DO NOT under any circumstances, cheat!!
~ I remember sitting in the car with my son (a year ago) talking about just that….he looked at me and said “Mom, you don’t have to worry. I’m not going to be like dad…..I’m not a player”, I was impressed but sad at the same time, because his father is married yet his overly flirtatious (cheating) ways haven’t been as discreet as he thought….but kids are stupid they see and hear things.
There have been moments that he had his heart broken …..seeing him hurt just killed me, but I gave it to him straight.
Teenage girls don’t know what they want ….. and some still don’t know what they want when they become adults.
She’s bad news if she flirts and is overly touchy with another guy while standing RIGHT NEXT TO YOU!!! She has no respect for you and loves the attention.
Learn to cook a couple good meals so you can impress your date. (I tried to teach him to make a few things so when he is out on his own he could impress the ladies….uhmmm….haven’t had much luck. I think frozen burritos or Hot Pockets will be on the menu)
Don’t wear dirty smelly clothes, wash them. (the day that I taught him how to do laundry he told me that he didn’t have to learn because “that’s what a girlfriend or wife are for”…….that was the WRONG thing to say to me; needless to say he had plenty of practice for weeks to come)
Put the toilet seat down!!
If the girl you are dating all of a sudden starts making excuses to not see you, stops texting and stops calling….there’s a problem. If we like you we will want to see you, if we don’t….we pull away.
If you are going to have sex, please use protection. (call your sister, she has connections with the condom fairy)
Do not hit a woman. When you feel like you are going to lose it….take a walk.
Being a pizza delivery boy may be ok now…….but women don’t marry pizza delivery drivers. Trust me….no woman wants to say “yeah my husband delivers pizza for a living”. Work towards a career that will bring you fulfillment.
Romance is NOT dumb.
Take the initiative to plan out a date .No one likes to have this conversation:
“so what do you want to do tonight”
“I don’t know, what do you want to do?”
“I don’t know, whatever you want to do”
I know some of the things that I have told my son probably will have to be repeated at one time of another….multiple times even, but he does know that if we (his sisters and I) hear that he broke a girl’s heart he will hear about it from us. All in all I think he will be fine……he’s a good kid!!