Today’s Guest Blogger – My Daughter, Ann (there was no bribing involved)

I am so happy about today’s Guest Blogger because she is my nineteen year old daughter, Ann. No, there was no bribing involved or threats………well I take that back, I did “threaten” to change the Barnes and Nobles password if she didn’t get this post to me on time. I know….I’m so mean!  

Ann loves to write and I thought this would give her the opportunity to share her short stories or her opinion on something that matters to her, never in a million years did I think she would choose to write about …………..me. 

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My mother and I have one of the best mother and daughter relationships there is. I consider her a best friend and a momma! I go to her for about almost everything, from the latest family gossip and daughter issues..to what her cat brought home at 6 am! She will always come to my need whenever I need my mother and not just as a best friend.. (which every girl needs!!)…But it wasn’t always all so hunky dory like it is now! And that’s where my story begins.   😉

I have bits and pieces that I remember about my mom as a little girl, most of them involved me getting in trouble hahaha I wasn’t always the innocent little angel my amazing mother writes about ;)–  i have always been the rebellious child! I was always running around at the age of 3 making my mom tear her hair out! She would try to spank me with a wooden spoon and i would laugh at her because it didn’t hurt! (yea i was a little brat! haha) But she still stood her ground with me as much as she could haha, taking me to the hospital countless times– because i had a fascination with sticking lint and fabric softener sheets up my nose! (THEY SMELLED GOOD!), she would care for my wounds with frozen peas and reward me with our favorite ice cream cones! She was my protector against monsters under my bed (i never slept in my room.. i always somehow made my way into the living room to sleep next to her on the sofa).. i was her backup singer every time a Shania Twain song came on through the radio. Though i was an evil little brat towards her all the time, she (being the mother she is) took care of me and my 2 other siblings to the best of her ability.

As you may already know from her past blogs, due to money issues and other complications, she had my siblings and myself move away to california with my dad. I will always remember that day i left, she was strong! I don’t even remember her crying! Though, at the time i didn’t know i was going to be moving away for good, i knew she wasnt going to be coming with us. And it was sad, because i was loosing my mother! And in a 4 yr olds mind that was a HUGE deal! She stayed strong for us that day, and assured me that we were going to have fun!.. Yes, that trip was a fun one, but over the next few years I barely ever got to see her that much.

Growing up, I won’t lie I felt abandoned by my mom because i did not know why she had to make the decision she did. It was hard at times, but i was with my dads family and times were good! I was part of a military family and moved and traveled a lot, so i knew we wouldn’t always see her. We would call each other, i would share secrets with her like mother and daughter, and we would see each other when we got the chance and money, but it wasnt until we moved back into the same town together did we rekindle our relationship.

I was just starting out in highschool when we moved near each other, and like any girl, i definitely needed my mother through those years. I grew closer to her, and shared secrets about boys and other girly things. We would have Sex and The City marathons! Read twilight together when i was going through that phase haha. She became my work out partner! We did EVERYTHING together. Yes we had many many many fights where we butted heads and exchanged some pretty nasty comments, but those really didn’t last long– due mainly to the fact that we loved to gossip and laugh and be with each other.

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Yes, our mother/daughter relationship didn’t sit well with some people — they felt like there should be a fine line to what mother and daughters should act like with each other. We should not share clothes, hang out as much as we did, talk about the things we did, or even confide in the stuff we did. BUT, we didn’t pay attention to their opinions hahaha because we were happy and best friends!!! She stood by me when there was no one else to stand by me, when I was all alone and had no money when i moved to college, she would call me and send me care packages and money when had nothing! My mom has been there for me through thick and thin, and my teammate when i was ganged up on. She has been the one person I confide in, my bestfriend, my gossip buddy haha, and most of all my mother!

I am blessed to have her by my side (though we live states apart), and no matter what people may think i am blessed to have such an amazing relationship with her.She has been through hell and back, not just with dealing with me, but with her life itself. AND I LOVE HER GUTS MORE THAN ANYTHING EVER! 🙂

~ Ann

I hope you enjoyed today’s post………..see there is hope out there for those parents who are at their wits end with their rumbustious child or rebellious teen. There is a silver lining………there will come a time when the lightbulb will come on and they will realize that you are in fact not the “worst parent ever”. For those of you that want to read  a little bit more on why I made very difficult decision for my kids to live with my ex-husband (their father) you can read about it here:

1. Open letter to my twenty something self  

2. Knowing what I know now 

I hated to read how my daughter felt abandoned and although we worked through that throughout the years it still pains me to read because I know that my ex-husband and his family played a huge part with telling my children that I “didn’t want them anymore” or “couldn’t handle them” which was so far from the truth. Again, I hope you take the time to read the links above. 

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22 thoughts on “Today’s Guest Blogger – My Daughter, Ann (there was no bribing involved)

  1. Love this! I asked my son to write me a guest post some time ago, but he’s far too worried about getting himself in trouble! Maybe in another few years he’ll write something lovely and heartfelt about me, like your daughter did for you 🙂

  2. This is so beautiful! and she can write really well! I’ve had 2 guests posts on my blog just twice, one was done by my 2 year old kid (my most viewed post ever) and the other by my 8 year old son (who sold me out!). I just think it’s nice that we sometimes involve our kids in what we do on our blog 🙂
    Great post Jolene!

    • I would love to read your post from your kids…..I will have to go check it out 🙂

      I’m not so sure what my son (17) or oldest daughter (22) would write but writing isn’t my sons favorite thing in the word……….but I may be surprised on what my oldest would post. hmmmm….something to think about.

    • We have come along way ……….

      I know some may think “what she abandoned her children”…. that’s why I added those links to the posts that will explain everything. It offers an insight to that time of my life when things were just were “complicated” and I just wanted the best for my children.

        • thanks (: ..yeah it was tough to write… i wont lie.. there might have been a tear or two! it was a tough time to go through–not having your mom. i remember when i was little i would look out into the farrrrr distance and pretend that she could see me and i would whisper “i love you mommy and i miss you” … its still hard to think about and i cant imagine my life with out her anymore

  3. SHE is an amazing child.
    Children do as they are taught to do. Rebellion comes with age.
    Character comes from parenting.
    YOU have done well.

    One only needs to read her words. If it weren’t so, she wouldn’t have said it….

    Be proud mamma.

    • Thank you Lisa!!!

      I’m very proud of the woman she has become.

      I am very thankful and blessed that she saw passed all the dislike and awful words that were thrown her way about me.

      She reminds me a lot of myself ….. her father would often say “you are just like your mother” hahaa…..but I guess, that’s not sooooo bad right??

      • If those words came from his mouth, then she must truly be proud of what she has become.

        And no, it isn’t bad.
        It is never bad to parent a strong young woman. It is never bad to parent a young woman who can manage on her own, who knows how to handle life; with it hardships. There is never anything wrong with that.

          • Ann,
            You termed “momma” perfectly and with grace. Momma starts with “mom”. You are giving her the most respect a child can give a person she bore.
            Mothers wait sometimes a lifetime to hear the love you have poured from your heart today to your momma. Most get it. A lot don’t.
            Live your life grateful for her sacrifices and love she has given. One day not only will you understand but you too will be able to share “her” joys, love, and parenting skills by passing them on yourself.
            Being a mom is not an easy task.
            Being a momma is even harder.
            You wrote an eloquent ode my dear.
            Write on!

  4. I really enjoyed reading this posted. It was nice to hear your daughters point of view. Glad there are no ill feelings between you and her. I can’t image how tough it must of been for all of you. As long as you and your kids are fine then it doesn’t matter what anyone else thinks.

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